Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Randomize
