we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
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