A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Randomize
