You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
Quick, to the slutcave!
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
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