Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
Life is so much better after having sex.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
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