who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
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