Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Randomize
