All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
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