so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
Randomize
