will power is for people who don't want to get laid
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize