that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
her facebook's as public as her vagina
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Randomize
