im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Randomize
