We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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