marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
