yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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