The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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