so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
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