you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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