It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
I'm passing your future prison.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Randomize
