I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
You ruined the universe
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
