I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
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