shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
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