Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
Randomize