I'm drive I can fine osifer
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
