I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Randomize
