another moral hangover. fuck.
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
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