Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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