ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
Randomize
