The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
