So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
