I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Just pee around me
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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