when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
