Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
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