Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize
