so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
Randomize
