Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
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