ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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