she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
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