Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
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