screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
