he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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