id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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