you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize
