FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
Considering that my ex-wife dumped me to become a lesbian, the Universe owes me a threesome.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
