do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
Randomize
