we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Randomize
