Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Randomize