I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Randomize
