does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize