do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
