im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Randomize
